Why you should re-organize your closet periodically…

January 26, 2011 in Fashion, Style by alliemcc

You may find a previously unknown, extremely important discovery that will advance science, win you the Nobel prize, and make you rich and famous and sexy!…

Science researchers have recently discovered a new bacteria species in the rust on the hull of the Titanic.

 

Rust "icicles" on the prow

Although the rust was sampled in 1991, no one bothered to look closely at the life forms hanging out in these rusticles– they just threw them into big plastic containers labeled "bacteria" or "fungi", stuffed them in the back corner, and then moved on to more glamorous things, like reupholstering the sofa. (OK, I'm taking some liberties with the story, but it's basically true.)

Mind you, the sunken Titanic was not even found until 1985, 73 years after it sank.

Titanic FailNow that this new Titanic-munching microbe has been identified, some people want to eradicate it and preserve the Titanic for tourists and documentary filmmakers of the future.

If they hadn't gone rooting around in the corners and dusty piles of the Official Top Secret Titanic Research Closet, they never would have found those little guys, and the Titanic would just melt away (unlike a certain dastardly iceberg)…

(What the crap does this have to do with fashion?, you may be wondering.  Here comes the punchline.)

Don't wait 73 years to find out what treasures, or possible new species, are hiding in your closet.

You may find a fabulous jacket that, with a little tweaking by a tailor, will be right on trend this year.

Or a skirt that needs to be shortened a little bit to become an up-to-date wardrobe staple.

Or a pastel sweater that just needs to go far, far away.

Don't abandon your clothes to Davey Jones's locker!But you don't have to do it alone!

Those microbes and pastel sweaters can be scary and overwhelming.

My Closet Editing Package is like a scientific SWAT team charging in, sampling your old and new clothes, labeling, categorizing, hauling away the useless stuff, and making suggestions on how the rest can actually revamp your wardrobe and make you look smart and sexy, like a microbiologist.

{Click here to hire me.}

Or get started on your own with my free PDF Style Calendar– {get it here.}

This bulletin has been brought to you by the Committee for the Honorable Advancement of scieNce Education and Literature, a division of Analogue Chic Enterprises. Better fashion through science!